May | In Your Dreams
A DREAM COLUMN
Hello, and welcome back to another month of In Your Dreams, the column where you write in to tell us the nuttiest things your unconscious throws at you, and we do our best to unscramble the emotional themes. The ancient Greeks and Romans believed dreams to be messages from the divine, and looked to dreams as a source of information about the past, present, and future. So, with that tradition in mind, let’s see what message the gods and goddesses have for us this month…
In this dream, my landlord knocks on my door, and tells me two additional people are moving into my apartment. Then a couple comes in and sets up a bed in the living room, acting like it’s normal for strangers to invade my home. So I hide out in my room but obsess that there are people on the other side of the wall, taking up what used to be my space. What does that mean?
Idk time to move? That’s your nuclear option.
Hmm, sounds a little cramped in there. But cramped how, exactly? Take a moment to assess how you feel physically in your space. Do you have room to breathe? Do you feel like yourself? Are you crowded by clutter or other people? Are you still using g*ddamn overhead lighting (have some self-respect!)? We can get used to a lot for the sake of stability and ease. It was key to our lizard brain survival. But when you’re unconsciously stifled in your homebase, it can leak out into other parts of your life.
If you’ve got a lot of stuff on hand, studies have shown that all your accumulated items take up space not only in the room but also in the brain. Thus, a physical decluttering also cleanses the mind. Dust off that old copy of Marie Kondo and start seeing what sparks joy and what freaking doesn’t. Enlist a friend or start small. Clean out one drawer that’s become a bummer. Finally donate that one pile of clothes taunting you from the corner. Small changes go a long way.
If you’re feeling like you want to give your space a facelift, there are endless internet headlines like SEVEN UNEXPECTED CURTAIN ALTERNATIVES or FIVE RENTAL-SAFE HACKS THAT MAKE LIFE WORTH LIVING. Do your research! There’s no shortage of advice on how to jazz things up—not to mention professionals to help—at many price points.
But maybe we’re in metaphor land, and it’s actually your emotional space that needs a zhuzh.
But maybe we’re in metaphor land, and it’s actually your emotional space that needs a zhuzh. The goal there is really the same. Like your physical space, your mind can always use a once-over. Maybe one of your relationships is taking up a lot of room, demanding more of your time or energy than you have available. Or, did someone spring something on you, an uninvited obligation, something like two new roommates taking over your living room? Decisions made on our behalf aren’t always easy to handle. Anyone who’s seen the Real Housewives fight over room assignments on vacation knows what it can look like when someone doesn’t get their way. (Answer: high drama and high art.)
Boundaries might serve you well with something or someone that’s asking a lot of you. It’s just the common area now, but you don’t want them escalating, and hopping in your trundle bed next. Just a liiiitle bit of extra space, when handled with integrity, can even strengthen the relationship.
You want to be able to move through your space freely again. To fall asleep reading on the couch on a rainy afternoon, to make a mess in the kitchen cooking something complicated and delicious, to dance like no one is watching, okay!? Find a way to create that feeling of peace for yourself in the conditions you’re working with, and you’re really on to something.
If you’ve ever woken up from a dream like, what the hell was that?, and would like to be featured in the next In Your Dreams, contact us at dreams@lunya.co with a detailed description of the inner workings of your unconscious mind. We're dreaming of hearing from you.